One Day, Peace Will Come

I get daily emails from a woman named Danielle LaPorte and honestly, she hits home quite a few times. Sometimes I think it’s silly to follow these types of people on social media and the like, but honestly, there are times when I need that third-party perspective of someone who doesn’t know who I am or what I’m going through. Sometimes that generic advice hits right in the guts and I can breathe and go “Ah. That’s way better”. I totally want her Desire Map journal though.

So imagine my surprise when into my inbox comes an entire post about why jerks show up in your life. Certainly everyone has dealt with a jerk or two. Or twenty. It could be that asshole from high school or that sibling who just doesn’t get it. Maybe it’s that stranger in the grocery store or your crotchety grandparent. Whatever the case, it’s no surprise that there are jerks everywhere.

I have dealt with my own fair share of jerks, some of which hit closer to home than I’d like. I’ve even had to call the police and file reports based on their shitty behaviour. That might be upping the ante from Jerk to bonafide Asshole, but the base is the same.

She goes on to tell her readers exactly why jerks exist. If I am to believe that they exist to help us review our lives and determine how we don’t want to be, then I guess I should be thankful to the current jerks trying to make my life a living hell.

Thank you for being an asshole. No, really, thank you. It’s helping me realize what behaviours I don’t want to have and it’s helping me identify how not to treat the people in my life.

Thank you for being a jerk for such a long time. It’s shown me that some people just don’t change. That they’re stuck in the middle of their small, pathetic lives and they have no joy inside them. That they can only find joy by attempting to torture others.

Thank you, all of you jerks, that have ever come into my life. All of you have forced me to realize things about myself that I might not have seen if you weren’t around. Just like you can’t make or do something better if you’re never wrong or never fail, you can’t make yourself a better person without the prime examples of what not to do.

So thanks, real life jerks, for teaching me more than the jerks on television ever could.

asshole

Mindful Musings #185

mindful-musings

Come, lay it down on me.

Bring your troubles

Your sorrows

Your joy

And your pain.

Come, lay it down on me.

Let me share in your burden,

In your fear,

Your agony,

And your smile.

Come, lay it down on me.

The good and

The bad.

I will take it all

And help you with your load.

Come, lay it down on me

And we will work together

To bring the sun back

Into your

Life.

 

Did Someone Order a Headless Chicken?

It’s been far too long since I just wrote a post about myself. I’ve been keeping up with the mindful musings but I haven’t had time to talk about me.

I’m sure you’ve all suspected that TAK has fallen by the wayside again. Indeed, it has. I’ve been quite stuck with it and have been considering rewriting the last few chapters I wrote previously as they just weren’t inspiring me.

Well, on to the life update!

I currently have two jobs. I’m a casual Crisis Counsellor at the women’s shelter where I live. Since I have personal experience with domestic abuse on various levels and I have this desire to help others I wanted to get out there and do more. Also, my husband is in his last year of school and after the debacle with him working last year it was agreed that I would be the one to have a second job.

The busy-ness doesn’t stop there! I have two freelance clients I do odd work for now and then for pocket change. It’s not much, but $20 here and there does add up and can make quite a dent on the credit card.

I am also taking two courses through Memorial University this term. Looking at the weight of the courses I should have only signed up for one but it’s too late now. I’ll work my hardest to get good grades to hopefully increase the chances of getting into my MEd program.

And then there’s the children, Spawn and Hatchling. Spawn has definitely had some behaviour issues that were really excessive in the last few years. It got bad enough in the last six months that I took him for an intake session for behaviour. Now I’m waiting to get a full assessment so I can hopefully figure out how to help him. While we wait, we’re actively going to the Y twice a week. Spawn is involved in 2 programs and I work out on the machines while he participates. I’ve realized, too late, that I have forgotten my iPod at home, however, so  I’m a tad upset about it.

It’s been a bit hard, emotionally, as well. It was my grandmother’s birthday at the beginning of the month and I’ve been getting actively harassed by losers who won’t leave me alone. It seems that ignoring them won’t work and I’d rather not engage their destructive behaviour.

Open to thoughts on that. What have you done to banish ne’er dowells back into the darkness?

nope

Mindful Musings #181

Mindful Musings

I never thought myself an addict

Until I realized

Not a day can go by

Without me

Consuming

Inhaling

Absorbing

The pale beige liquid

Of either a warm decaf vanilla latté

Or a sweet decaf tea,

The same brand my grandmother used,

So that it washes me in warmth

And love.

Perhaps I am addicted

To this morning ritual of

Comfort

Peace

And

Love.